Topical Tuesday, Weekly Posts

Topical Talk: Valentines Day

I think it’s time we had a talk about Valentines Day.

Topical Talk: Valentines Day

In all honesty I wasn’t planning to post anything for Valentines Day since this isn’t super relevant to book blogging. However, I decided it was time to share my opinions about Valentines Day as a discussion post with a viewpoint I don’t think many people share.

First, some context. I’m not currently in a relationship, nor have I ever been. I’m 17 – 18 in June – and as far as I know, I’m the oldest person I know who has never had a relationship. I’m a cynical person at heart. While I also consider myself an optimist, I’m more logically than emotionally driven. I’m a mix of Ravenclaw and Slytherin.

Valentines Day, to me, has always been a day of mixed emotions. It is only in the last year or so that I have become able to express this discomfort.

I suppose my biggest problem with Valentines Day is that it can only be properly celebrated by a select group of people: those in happy relationships on a specific day of the year. Great, good for them! I mean that sincerely – but to attempt to force everyone into the same frame of mind isn’t possible nor healthy.

This year, however, I feel like that discomfort has been multiplied by the several long, ranting posts on social media trying to shame fellow single pessimists for not loving Valentines Day, or trying to defend Valentines Day.

I get it. If you’re in a happy, loving relationship you’re bound to want to celebrate that. Here, though, I draw the line.

Not everyone is happy on Valentines Day in the same way that not everyone is happy at Christmas, or Mothers Day, or Fathers Day. Many of us who are uncomfortable with Valentines Day may also be struggling with low self-esteem issues – obviously this doesn’t apply to every single person, but whether single for a long time or newly leaving a relationship, it is incredibly easy to feel down at Valentines.

There is also the argument that Valentines Day is a huge commercial scam, and to be honest? I completely agree with this too.

The message of spending time with family and friends is pushed as a way to beat the Valentines Blues, but even this doesn’t feel quite right. Essentially it boils down to this: anyone with a partner is supposed to gush about how in love they are, and anyone without a partner is supposed to celebrate with friends and family. I don’t like the idea that friends are an ‘alternative’ to a partner. If Valentines Day is about friends and family, the entire dating theme wouldn’t exist. Therefore, family and friends become the unlucky trade-off for not being in a relationship.

I’m almost certain that these thoughts are due to my age and lack of relationships, but I definitely struggle to stay positive on a day like Valentines Day – and you know what? I don’t think I should be ashamed of that. In summary: single at Valentines? Embrace it. Do something for you, and remember it’s a day just like any other day.

Side note: I’m aware there was a problem with Monday’s post, I’m currently on holiday and only just noticed now. The post has been removed and I’ll be reposting it either later this week or in the usual Monday spot next week.

Do you have any thoughts about Valentines? Share my cynical opinion? Disagree or have anything to add? Please, share your thoughts in the comments below!

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